Living with a narcissistic man can turn any relationship into a total nightmare. Instead of having a partner who is capable of giving you emotional support when things go wrong in your life, you are always going to be treading on eggshells while they throw more tantrums than Elton John. So if this sounds like the relationship from Hell, what are the tell-tale narcissistic husband traits you should look out for before tying the knot?
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First and foremost, there are different degrees of narcissism. A small tendency towards narcissism is relatively healthy—placing some importance on self means that you are unlikely to act as a doormat to those around you. But a high degree of narcissism can lead to a very dysfunctional relationship.
Narcissists can be very intense in the early stages of a relationship. They bombard you with love and attention and place you on a pedestal, literally sweeping you off your feet. But unfortunately this person is very often not what they appear to be and before long their true colours begin to shine.
If you are married to a narcissistic man, you are going to have to accept the fact that a narcissistic husband will never love you more than he loves himself. Any person with narcissistic tendencies is incredibly selfish to the point where they genuinely believe that the rest of the world revolves around them. Consequently, one of the main narcissistic husband traits is an intense preoccupation and absorption with self. They are not interested in your life because they are far too busy focusing on their own needs, preferences, and potential pathways to success.
Narcissistic husbands are very often extremely controlling and manipulative. They will try to isolate you from your friends and family so that you are more dependent on them. Withholding affection and attention is one way to control you, but they can also be verbally cruel and take pleasure from provoking you with hurtful words because they find it entertaining. Many narcissistic husbands are prone to ranges and tantrums, rather like a toddler. It is a form of attention seeking, and just like a spoiled child, any attention is good, even if it involves making you cry.
A refusal to accept responsibility is a classic trait of a narcissistic husband. No matter what goes wrong, it will never be their fault. They will be quick to blame you for their failures, even when the finger of blame is pointing squarely at them.
Many narcissistic husbands are also pathological liars. They will try and manipulate you with a complex web of lies and half truths. Their highly selective memory will filter out the truth and they will probably accuse you of being at fault. Narcissistic men will lie about everything in an attempt to justify their behavior, but if you dare to question their version of the truth, they will probably lash out in anger or come up with an even more absurd lie to explain away the inconsistencies in their story.
Other traits of a narcissistic husband include a tendency towards addictive behavior, infidelity, violence and cruelty.